By Lorna Benson
October 21, 1997A new survey shows 78
percent of Minnesotans rank their families as
"very" or "exceptionally"
strong. The survey was sponsored by the Minnesota
Public Radio Civic Journalism Initiative, Family
and Children's Service of Minneapolis, and the
Minnesota Historical society.
The findings seem to run counter to popular
notions that families are falling apart because
of rampant teen drug use, domestic violence and
divorce.
Minnesota Family Strength Project
THE SURVEY'S MAIN FINDING
- that Minnesota families feel overwhelmingly
strong - surprised researchers. Terry Steeno,
Executive Director of Family and Children's
Service in Minneapolis, says, in general,
families felt extremely good about their
physical, mental, and financial health, just a
few of the strength measurements used in the
survey.
Steeno: I think the popular opinion
is that all families are struggling. I think
we all struggle at different times, but in
reality what we're finding with this study is
that families do work. Families do meet the
needs of their members. In fact it's a small
percentage of people that cannot rely on
their families.
The survey polled 1000 people through a random
statewide telephone survey.
Researchers also asked an additional 400
families to complete a 200-question survey
seeking more detailed information. Finally, the
study convened a dozen small group meetings -
including people from African-American, American
Indian, Chicano/Latino, Somalie, and Vietnamese
backgrounds - to discuss the state of families.
The survey did find some differences in
family strength based on the family's particular
make-up. In the survey, gay and lesbian families
without children scored their strength higher
than any other group. Traditional families with
two heterosexual parents and children at home
ranked second - along with gay and lesbian
couples with children, and multi-generational
families. Single-parent families and
single-person families were next, followed by
step-families and co-habitating adults without
children. The weakest families were co-habitating
adults with children.
Steeno says when families did have problems,
typically it wasn't because of big issues.
Steeno: It was the day-to-day
hassles - whether the kids did their chores,
or did the parents agree on parenting. All
those sorts of things were much more trying
for families than a major change like a
death, or a marriage, or something like that
- that kind of crisis - I think people could
weather that kind of stress, but they're not
prepared for the everyday kind of hassles,
and that's gradually what causes them to grow
apart.
According to Paulie and Debra Talen, a lesbian
couple with three young children, those daily
hassles are somewhat easier to handle because of
their family make-up.
Paulie says she is freer in her relationship
to do what she is best at:
Paulie Talen: There isn't sort of a
preconception about one of us going off to
work and one of us staying home - or one
worrying about the pediatrician appointments,
and one managing the friendships. You know, I
think some heterosexual couples get trapped
into some of that, and we get to re-decide
and re-divide-up some of those things.
Debra says that sort of deliberate re-thinking
of roles extends to other areas of the Talens'
relationship, especially when it came to having
children.
Debra Talen: For those of us who
got together as a gay or lesbian couple and
then chose to bring children into our lives,
we've had to do it in such a conscientious
way. We've had to (2-year-old starts
chattering) - yes, honey - we've had to work
at it.
But the Talens feel uncomfortable speaking for
all gays and lesbians. Debra says, while the
survey's findings mirror her life nicely, there
are probably many gays and lesbians who don't
feel as strong in their relationships because
they might be hiding their sexual orientation
from others - or they may be in abusive
relationships.
Psychologist and survey researcher Judy Tiesel
says it's important NOT to generalize too much
when looking at survey findings garnered during
the second phase of the study, when researchers
focused on a much smaller group of hand-picked
families.
Tiesel: That's why we want to be
real careful with the Level 2 results to not
infer that this does represent all the
gay/lesbians in Minnesota and their family
units. Because it was a very small sampling.
And yet, for those who did participate in
that study who are doing so well, I think we
can learn what is it that's contributing to
them doing so well in their family strength.
Some other highlights from the family strength
survey include the observations of adolescents
who often saw their family as more chaotic and
rigid than their parents did.
Researchers were surprised to find out most of
the adults surveyed believed their current family
is stronger than the family they grew up in.
Steeno: I think, prior to this, we
always thought that people would look back
and say the family of the 50s was the strong
family, and that isn't what this confirmed.
The majority thought their current family was
stronger than their family of origin.
Researchers are still analyzing the data they
gathered on Minnesota families. They're hoping to
continue their work with follow-up surveys.
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